Late

I'm three days late.

I was due Friday. It's now Monday.

On Friday, I took a pee test. It was negative.

I took another one Saturday. It malfunctioned.

I have no tests left. Til Wednesday, when a new kit arrives via Amazon, though it will probably be moot by then, as I explained to my friend J, feeling certain that nothing will bring my period on faster today than if I go to the trouble to order more tests.

Those puppies are expensive. How much have I spent on sticks to urinate on alone, in the past four years? Probably a few hundred dollars.

I feel vaguely ill-at-ease and crampy. This could, according to the internet, mean almost anything. It could as easily mean yes as it could mean my period is imminent.  Which it probably is. Right?

But even so. Three days late.

A calendar review confirms this is the latest I have been this year. In January I was two days late. There was day of, the next day, and then the day after that it came. This time I'm day of, Saturday, Sunday, and now it's Monday.

What do I want the answer to be, is the question. Hard to know. Hard to decide in the midst of so much uncertainty. Hard not to examine and over-analyze.