Today for Montessori you chose to wear:
1. Jean shorts
2. Red "Support Texas Bookstores" t-shirt
3. Red Mount Gay Rum Figawi 2019 hat, signed "To Railmeat" by the crew, as it's the first race you did when you were in utero.
4. Vineyard Vines whale belt kitted out with CYC keychain repurposed to serve as a scabbard, with bright green foam sword.
5. Light up red spider cowboy boots
And on the way out you announced that today you were Sir Gareth of Orkney as a kid.
Well, one thing's for sure - you are definitely my son.
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